Will You Ever Know?
by cykekik
Summary: Basically a drabble about how Johan feels towards Judai. One-sided love, Johan's POV in third Person.


Hey, it's been a while hasn't it? Especially since I last touched the Gx fandom(fanfiction wise). Almost two years since I last written here huh? Well, to be honest, I have been out of it for a while, but I got back recently thanks to a friend. So basically I wrote this 2am in the morning, feeling tired. Sorry if Johan seems OOC or if there's any obvious mistakes.

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><p><em>Sometimes it feels like you have loved a person so much that you lose sleep each night, wandering about their ware bouts. Your mind would always be filled with the thought of them, but sadly, you do not know if your love is requited or unrequited. It feels like two hands around our throat, suffocating us, not allowing us to express how we feel towards them as much as we would want to. The fortune of being their friend was that we could stay by their side whenever we want and care about them. The downside was we would always be friend zoned, especially if we belonged in the same sex group. Would they ever know how we feel?<em>

Johan Andersen, nineteen years old was packing up for his trip back to Duel Academy. His mind would be filled with Judai, the boy who took the risks of saving him from the Alternate Dimension. It pained him when he thought about the brunette going through so much pain, just so he could retrieve him back from the other realm. At the same time he was flattered that he meant so much to Judai, but again, he was only a good friend of the other duelist, a friend who shared many similarities with him.

There really wasn't much for the turquoise headed male to pack, just his dueldisk and a few pairs of underwear to change into. He smiled at the thought of seeing the headstrong duelist, the one person he really trusted. After all, having his family torn away from him at such a young age and then being put in an orphanage resulting him to trust nobody. For the first time in his life, he knew how to have fun with an actual human being. For the first time in his life, he knew how to wholeheartedly place his trust in a person. Maybe that was why he was so willing to sacrifice himself to save the school, he knew how much they meant to Judai. He had nothing to lose, but Judai had so many things that meant the world to him. At that time he really just wanted to fulfill his last wish, to make the person he loved so dearly happy.

Then Johan frowned, remembering the aftermath of what he had done. Not only did he not make Judai happy, he caused him so much grief. It was as if he could hear the brunette screaming his name from the school even if they were in different dimensions. It was a spiritual bond, an act of cohesion, not physically, but mentally.

He never thought about the factor of Judai being stubborn enough to go back looking for him. However, Johan wasn't there to see it. Yubel had already made a deal with him, managed to manipulate him easily because Judai would be able to return to Duel Academy, re-living his life happily without Johan. As much as it pained him, he agreed to the offer. Easily, he had his body taken over by the spirit. Slowly, his eyes begun to close and soon enough, he fell into a deep slumber.

Brushing the depressing thoughts off his shoulders, Johan zipped his bag up before picking it up on the ground. The ferry should arrive in an hour or so. The duelist decided to get some fresh air, so he headed towards the pier early. It took a good ten minutes before arriving at the scene, he sat down on the edge, looking out into the seas.

It truly bugged the European that Judai didn't go to the pier of Duel Academy when he was departing with the other duelists. Sure, he waved warmly at the people present, but it really bugged him? Why was Judai not there? Was he blaming him because he ruthlessly left them at Duel Academy? Judai, what happened? Maybe he could ask when he arrived at Duel Academy.

Soon he heard a honking noise, he looked towards where the sound came from. Ah, it was his ferry. He could see lights shining across the ocean. Without any effort, Johan stood up, awaiting the ferry to stop so he could get on. When it did stop, Johan made his way on the ferry. He saw Jim and O'Brian, but only gave them a casual greeting. He was tired, after all, he spent the night before thinking about Judai as well. A sad smile flashed on his face, it was almost as if he was near his tears. His two eyes, closed as if he was asleep, but really, he was restless.

_Oh Judai, how you can make him worry so much. It's almost magical how you could make him so restless, so frantic. If only you knew how he felt towards you, if only you requited the love Johan felt towards you. _


End file.
